We lower our expectations – if a guy asks a question we think he’s a keeper. Most guys give one word answers and expect us to keep the conversation going. He actually asked me how my day was?! Definite boyfriend material.
Whilst also raising them – he doesn’t have a sleeve? No beard? He’s not a CEO? Doesn’t wear a 3 piece suit daily and own a pug? Not interested. Who cares if he actually has a decent personality.
We become skittish – we get ‘ghosted’ (for those of you blissfully unaware of this term, it refers to when a guy or girl stops communication with no warning and you don’t hear from
them again) so often that we try to for see the signs of when a guy will suddenly cut contact with us. Cue a series of frantic thoughts. ‘It’s been 3 hours since he last messaged!’ ‘His last message was briefer than normal.’ ‘He’s been busy all week! Am I going to be ghosted?’
We lower our self esteem – the dating game is an endless worry (at least for women) of wondering who else the guy is spending his time with. We stalk there Instagram’s and Facebook for signs of other girls and never stop comparing ourselves (and finding a way to fall short) to all of them.
We become worse people – for some reason both men and women place a lower level of respect on people they have met online then with people they met in real life. Maybe because that initial bond wasn’t there but was instead a mutual right swipe. With the ones we aren’t interested in we are ruder, more abrupt and don’t care if it doesn’t materialise into anything as there will always be another waiting at the touch of a swipe.
So call me old fashioned, but I still believe that nothing can beat a relationship that began based on chemistry, conversation and mutual respect for one another.